Yesterday I hit the 35 week mark.... so much for that midwife that thought I wouldn't make it till then! While it is still kind of early to have the baby I won't have to go to the hospital where there is a NICU. I still have contractions that are timeable. Some are uncomfortable. But looking back to my pregnancy with Josiah I don't think they are as bad. I do know that by this time with Josiah I was being kept awake at night from the contractions.... So far that hasn't happened. (Knock on wood!)
Now if I can just get past the last few weeks! Emma and Josiah were born just a couple days short of 38 weeks. Um that's 2 1/2 weeks from now! I am 100% sure I am NOT ready for a new baby. That is what is torturing me! I want so badly to be done being pregnant. I am tired of being uncomfortable. Tired of the horrendous heartburn (the worst I have ever had it.) Tired of the constant trips to the bathroom. Just tired of sharing my body with the baby! But when I think of the alternative... baby on the outside making it three kiddos to take care of.... I am scared... crapless!
I do know that it wouldn't be so bad and I wouldn't be dreading it or fearing it if Josiah were older. I wasn't worried at all about taking care of he and Emma when I was getting close to the end. I just figured that Emma would be my little helper. And she was! But Josiah??? That is a totally different story! He is a mama's boy through and through. And while I think it is so sweet how much he needs me and clings to me it is upsetting me to think about how it will be when he realizes there is another baby taking his mommy's attention. If I dwell on it long enough I cry!
Then of course there is the sleeping situation that is still unpredictable at best! Last week he slept in his playpen all night 5 out of 7 nights. And while he still whimpers in the night and we still have to get up and give him his binky we don't have to always pick him up and be up with him for hours on end anymore. He was sleeping with us just fine at first but started to get really restless and wouldn't sleep! He wanted to play! So sleeping with us is now just reserved for the nights when we can't console him no matter what we do. This is a vast improvment to what we were dealing with two months ago. But I still worry about how it is all going to work when the baby comes. We don't want to put Josiah back in his crib in the kids room yet until he can sleep without crying out.... That just opens a whole other can of worms called Emma! So he will be in our room for a while after the baby is born. I can just see it now! Baby cries... Josiah cries.
At any rate... I am still excited about meeting Abby and seeing what color hair she has and who she looks like. I am really interested in seeing what her size is in comparison to Josiah. (Um... still a little scared of labor... memory too fresh in my mind!) I can't wait to give nursing another try... and this time do it! I am anticipating having a little baby to hold and cuddle. Oh and I am REALLY excited to put all the little cloth diapers on her! So I am still normal but I have fears!
So as it stands today I am 35w 1d. If Abby graces us with her presence when Emma and Josiah did that is just 2 weeks and 3-4 days from now... Yikes!! I better get the rest of my preparation done! Because if the next 2-3 weeks go by as fast as the last few have then I will be posting pics of Abby in no time!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment